Coach Alexandrea J's Reading Nook

This was absolutely excellent!

It was incredibly thorough and totally opened my eyes to the realities of stranger rape, acquaintance rape, and date rape. It is so important that men AND women read this book to become aware of what is happening in our society, how to protect ourselves and our loved ones, and how damaging non-consenual sex is not just for the individual who was harmed but also for our society as a whole.

As per usual, here is my book review:

What I liked:

• It was incredibly thorough. The book was based on a study that was done to identify the frequency of rape and to understand how and why this happens. The research that they found was painful & stunning because we are so unaware of often we are encouraged to believe in the very things that later contribute to rape culture.

• This book could've easily become similar to that of a textbook. It could've become boring and just fact-listing but it didn't. Although it is a very serious and fact based book, the author did a great job of keeping the book conversational so you could actually understand and enjoy reading it.

• It was incredibly realistic & practical. I was able to see how easy it is for anyone to find themselves in this situation. You can't assume that just because you know someone-nothing will happen to you. You can't assume that only strangers are the ones who are dangerous to you. I am not encouraging us to run around paranoid but I am encouraging us to be aware of our surroundings and that people we are around. Women are four times more likely to experience rape from someone they know rather than someone they don't. That is a very scary statistic. Both men and women should know this and be careful of the people around us. We should also watch out for one another and support each other so we can all create a safe world for us

• It was very thorough. The book talks about all the various kinds of rape, the facts surrounding it, how society reacts to it, how police, court, and universities react and then even talks about how men and women can create change. They discuss what parents, schools, and lawmakers can do and what friends and family can do if someone they love has been raped. I LOVE the fact that then book goes on to talk about what we can do if we've been raped and it was incredibly honest and practical-listing things out step by step.

What I Didn't Like:

• Nothing. I truly enjoyed reading this book all the way through.

Do I Recommend This Book:

Completely. I'm totally serious. PLEASE read this book. Even if you're "not interested" in learning about this. It's SO important and so easy to read. We all need to know how to handle these situations just incase this happens to us or our friends or family. It truly will change how you look at your world and empower you to make a difference.

Quotes: Whether they acknowledge their experience as rape or not, 30 percent of the women identified in the study as rape victims contemplated suicide after the incident.

85 percent of women knew the men who raped them (as in they were raped by someone they knew).

Lessons:

Rape is not something that only occurs to women who are walking alone in the dark by someone who they don't know. Rape can occur on a date, at a party, or even by a family member or close friend. It is very important that we stay safe and we practice consensual sex-make sure the person wants to have sex with you before you do anything. If a person changes their mind, they have the right to do so and you have to honor that. Do not force anyone to do something they are uncomfortable with. And if someone you know or if you have been harmed sexually, it is NOT your fault. Even if you feel like you did something "foolish" (like you drank too much or you "trusted" the person or you were making out and things got out of a hand. It is never your fault if someone has hurt you.

I'll probably do a book talk on this topic on my new radio show so be sure you follow me to know when that goes live because I definitely want to discuss this. :)